Silver
by tRagikTRuth
Summary: The ones who seem to understand everything are often the hardest for others to understand. Given no insight, how were the others to know? Blinded by the music, afraid of the fire, they lost the one that might have saved them all. Companion to Blaze.
1. Chapter 1

Summary: The ones who seem to understand everything are often the hardest for others to understand. Given no insight, how were the others to know? Blinded by the music, afraid of the fire, they lost the one that might have saved them all. Companion to Blaze.

Length: 13 chapters; 26,361 words; 71 pages

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Chapter 1

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Alice opened her eyes slowly and quickly shut them again. She made a face, turned over, and hid her eyes against the chest of the man lying beside her. Gin stroked her hair once and let his lips drift across the top of her head. They lay for a while longer in each other's arms before Gin disengaged himself and walked over to the small vanity against the far wall from her futon. He picked up Alice's hair brush and ran it quickly through his silver hair.

She sat up and let the blanket drop to her waist, revealing a tight grey tank top. She brought her knees half way up and folded her arms over them, watching him prepare to leave in silence. Finally he felt he wouldn't attract too much attention if he was spotted heading back to his office – though she knew he wouldn't be seen anyway, he just didn't like to take chances – and he stepped over to lean down and kiss her teasingly.

"My place tonight, Darlin' Girl," he reminded her quietly. She nodded numbly, the morning making her mind hazy. Smiling his frightening smile, Gin slipped out the window with silent, easy grace and disappeared.

Alice stayed where she was for a while trying to work up the motivation to move. Eventually she stood and started rooting through her wardrobe for something to wear. She selected a rich red short sleeved shirt with her favourite oversized jeans and a belt to keep them on. She slipped on her black and white converse and sat in front of the mirror to start the hair-and-makeup process. As this task was second nature to her, she let her mind wander as she worked.

She could never forget exactly how it had all started, this relationship-thing. After the trip to Auschwitz with Rose – it had been Rose's idea and, having already gone, Alice had refused whole-heartedly until two hours before they returned to Soul Society, breaking on the argument that it would probably be Rose's only chance to see it – they had both been apathetic. Alice would wander away and hide or lock herself in her room for whole days, staring off at nothing.

One day, sitting back in the shadows of the outer wall, contemplating the meaning of life and trying to keep her mind off of the miserable things she'd seen again, she'd been confronted by a hand, offering a half empty bottle of water to her. Looking up, she'd seen the ever-smiling silver haired Third Division captain leaning over her.

"_Hey there,"_ he'd said. _"What's got ya cryin', little girl?"_

She'd been too depressed to be offended by being called a little girl. Instead, she'd replied, _"It… it was nothing."_

Captain Ichimaru had tilted his head to the side. _"Aw, don' lie ta me now,"_ he'd chided. _"Tell me what's wrong."_

Alice had sighed. _"I was just feeling a little depressed is all…"_

"_Why?"_

A bit of annoyance had stirred at being questioned when she wanted to be left alone, but it had died as quickly as most emotions those days. _"Well…"_ She'd taken the water bottle from him but hadn't opened it. _"My friend and I went to the Krakow last time we went shopping and at the last minute she convinced me to go to Auschwitz with her because she didn't want to go alone. It was a reasonable request, except that I'd been before and she knew how I felt about it."_

"_Mmm."_ Gin had straightened, still looking down at her. _"How 'bout you an' I head back ta my office and ya can tell me all 'bout it, alrigh'? We're attractin' a lot of attention, ya know."_

Alice had looked around, surprised. Souls were pausing on their way to wonder what they were doing. _"Alright,"_ she had agreed reluctantly. He was a little creepy, even though he'd yet to give her a reason to mistrust him.

And here they were, sneaking around to sleep with each other, hiding from the rest of the world. Alice knew that her captain despised Gin and would kill her for doing what she was doing; she knew full well that everyone thought he was strange and something was off about him. She had thought so at first as well. As time went by, though, she came to know differently.

Gin was calm and collected and polite in public. She sometimes thought that he wanted people to be uneasy around him. He was merciless in training and battle. He would go to any end to reach his goal, whatever it happened to be. But when it was just the two of them, he was sweet and gentle and passionate. He was a surprisingly sensual lover. She knew he could simply be putting on an act for her, but it didn't seem to matter so much anymore. Every night that one of them wasn't gone, they were together. During the day she waited impatiently for the night to come, so she could go see him.

Alice inspected her eyeliner one more time before she got up. She smiled with the sun and danced along the corridor to the office to get her day's assignments. She paused, her hand on the doorknob.

And maybe he _was_ all those things everyone thought he was; she wouldn't put it passed him. And maybe he was using her for some complex end. Maybe she was a meaningless distraction. She couldn't find it in herself to care as much as she should.

She opened the door.

Rose was on a mission on her own, tracking down a minor Hollow problem in the 54th prefecture. She would probably be gone until sometime in the afternoon and in the meantime, Alice would continue daydreaming.

Quietly she collected a stack of paperwork to complete and slipped over to the Fourth Division gardens as she usually did when she had to work. She spread herself and her work out in the lush grass and set to the task of signing and reading.

There was probably going to be a problem if she got too attached to Gin. He was nice, warm company at night, but the way he treated her left her in danger of falling in love with him, something that she desperately hoped wouldn't ever happen.

Alice snorted. Who was she kidding? She'd been in love with him for some time now, no matter how much she denied it.

Something she was blessed with, she thought, and was secretly proud of, was insight. Empathy. As such, she had no delusions about the way Gin felt; she could love him all she wanted, but when he was done with her, if he got bored or found something better, if she got in his way, he would have no problem dropping her. She thought that Gin probably knew how she felt as well, but it wouldn't stop him from breaking her heart. It probably just made the whole thing more amusing to him.

"Hey there, beautiful."

Alice broke off from her work and thoughts to smile up at Hisagi. "Hey yourself," she returned. He sat cross legged next to her and reached out for a strand of her shoulder length dark brown hair. He ended up with half of a bright red highlight. Alice giggled.

She and Hisagi had been openly dating for a while, ever since a party they'd gone to in East Rukon. She never felt bad about dating him and sleeping with Gin. She was fairly certain that Hisagi knew he wasn't the only one. She was also fairly certain he knew she didn't love him like he loved her. It was okay with both of them – she enjoyed his company and being able to lie in his arms in the sun like she couldn't with Gin, and she did love him, sort of; he was so enamoured that he would take whatever part of her she was willing to give.

"What's up?" she inquired, rolling over and pushing her work away simultaneously.

Hisagi shrugged. "Does there need to be an emergency for me to come see you?"

"No." Alice propped herself up on her elbow. She considered him momentarily. When he didn't seem to notice, lost in thought, she reached out to stroke the tattoo on his cheek. "You alright?"

Hisagi sighed and then shrugged. "I can't complain." His dark eyes were sharp as they met hers. "Are you?"

She frowned. "Do I seem not-alight?"

"You've been sort of distant." He wasn't looking at her again.

"You're the one lost in thought all the time," she muttered.

"See?"

Alice sighed. She leant up and kissed him gently, lingering at his lips. "I'm sorry. I hadn't noticed."

With that wrinkle in his nose that meant he forgave her, Hisagi returned the favour. He rested his forehead against hers. "I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing."

Alice laughed brightly and mussed his already messy hair. She offered no answer. She wasn't sure either.

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Author's Note: Because I remembered today and chances are I'd forget by tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 12

Chapter (-12)

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There were many things Gin enjoyed concerning Alice. First was undoubtedly the sex. Next came the buzz he got from sneaking around. Third was the way she was willing to steal around behind her captain's back, knowing full well how much he disliked the Third Division Captain. He liked the control he had over her. He liked that she liked the control he had over her.

He liked the feel of her small body against his at night. He took pleasure in the warmth of her body, the sense of her burning blood beneath her skin, the heat that flared when he touched her. He enjoyed the cold nights dispelled by her feverish presence.

Alice was very open with Gin, and honest. She was pretty. She didn't object to his asking to keep them a secret. She was shy and quiet, but once she was comfortable with a person she could get loud. She was easily embarrassed; he liked the blush across the bridge of her nose and consequently teased her often. She smiled all the time, like him – but her smile was beautiful and well liked, and frequently got her things she wanted. She was secretly underhanded and lied with the ease that only came to natural-born liars like himself. All of these traits, Gin liked about Alice.

He smiled down at her as she beat her fists against his chest. She was angry, for whatever reason, and so she was taking it out on him. He had known from the moment he entered her room what she was going to do – he could tell by the way she determinedly ignored him.

Tears slipped occasionally down her cheeks; her sharp nails – painted bloody instead of acrylics – scratched across his skin and tore at his clothing; she let loose a frustrated wail and smacked him hard across the face. He took it in stride with that satisfied grin still in place. This only seemed to infuriate her more and she launched herself back into the attack with renewed vigour. She hit him again, hard enough to raise a bruise the size and shape of her small fist on his shoulder.

This had happened more often of late, this violent reaction. It didn't hurt, not really, and only served to make Gin's blood raced in his veins. He found the way she just broke like that exceedingly thrilling. Alice was probably the most non-confrontal person he'd ever met besides Unohana Retsu, so it was amusing to watch her boil over. Usually she just yelled and screamed. Tonight he'd gotten lucky – though she could resolve most of her issues physically, it was only very rarely that she actually hit him.

He was never so excited as when she would launch herself at him like an angry cat and claw at his skin.

But inevitably, this fight ended as they always did – in bed.

In less time than it took to blink, he had her crushed against him, his lips over hers, taking all that fury and turning it into passion. She made a small noise of surprise and protest and backed away. He moved with her until she tipped over the frame of her bed and they tumbled back across the mattress. It was all he could do not to rip her clothes off and all she could do not to let him. The springs squeaked in protest as he moved her somewhat gently into a more conventional position; she stopped struggling and settled for shoving her hands under his haori and pushing it off of his shoulders.

Gin mused that Alice really needed to get rid of the bed frame. It made too much noise.

Alice whined insistently against his mouth and he turned his attention back to her. She clawed now at his clothes instead of his body and, piece by piece, the clothes complied with her wishes.

Until Gin decided it was time to take back control. He stilled her hands easily in the same motion that removed her shirt, effectively pinning her arms beneath her and using her own weight and his to keep them there. Then, began the sweet torture.

He slid his hands down her sides and back up, slowly. She bit her lip and squeezed her eyes shut to keep quiet, repressing a whimper. He let his lips taste her skin in the lightest of touches, tingling down her jaw and neck, across her shoulders. She shuddered beneath him and didn't bother to keep in the newest moan.

He slid one hand just up under the edge of her mini skirt and grazed it there across her thigh. She nearly cried out, her back arching as she tried to free her hands. Gin pushed her gently back down after assuring that her hands were still secure. He traced his fingers a little higher against the back of her leg, along a scar he knew ran the length of her hamstring. She giggled a little and let her eyes flick open to gaze at him.

The evening could stretch on for hours like this. Gin wasn't sure yet if he wanted to continue his ministrations or end it swiftly and just satisfy his need. He let no hint of his indecision come through in his touch. She mewled against his lips when his thumb found the spot just over her hip bone and started rubbing. The mew turned swiftly into a gasp as he locked his lips around the back edge of the crook of her neck and sucked hard. That, with the thumb on her hip, sent her into writhing convulsions, trying to free herself, trying to stop him.

Finally Gin raised his head again. "An' how was yer day?" he purred innocently.

Alice hadn't forgotten all of her anger yet. She glared at him. "Stop teasing."

He rested his body over hers, slipped his left hand farther up her skirt while his other supported him. "Aw, I'm not teasin', Darlin' Girl," he whispered. "Why don' ya tell me what got ya so mad, hm?"

Alice bit her lip again when he licked her neck. "It's not… not important…" she sighed.

"No," he agreed solemnly. He trailed his tongue around the pulse of her carotid artery. She shivered.

"Gin," she pleaded.

He lifted his head to give her an innocent smile, as though he didn't know what she wanted. His fingers tickled the back of her knee. "Hm?"

"_Gin!_" He never failed to get a reaction out of her.

"Ah," he said, pretending that the answer had just dawned on him. "I see." He smirked devilishly and kissed her slowly. After a long moment he arched his back enough to give her use of her hands again.

The night was still young.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

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Alice twisted her fingers into Hisagi's and smiled over at him. He grinned back and squeezed her hand in return. They tread slowly down one of the side streets in Rukongai together, out looking for anything interesting.

Usually Alice would just run by. She would keep running until she was out of breath and exhausted, until she could barely make it back to her room before she collapsed. As such, she'd never really seen much of Rukongai, though she could wander anywhere amongst its streets and not get lost, or, given specific, noticeable landmarks, lead anyone there.

Strolling along with Hisagi, she had time to really look around, notice the sights and the people. They were in one of the better districts, so the souls weren't so bad off as some she'd seen. They were dressed in, if not nice, clean clothing that wasn't tattered; some even wore makeup. Their speech was educated; their children were happy and well fed. They seemed content with life in this district. It was very peaceful, all in all.

The buildings around her were impeccably painted in whites, blues, oranges, and reds. A couple of green and purple houses dotted here and there. Gardens grew in windowsills and outside the larger houses.

Hisagi steered her away from a low hanging set of steps one could pull down to get to the roof of a house they passed. She shook her head and kissed his cheek in thanks.

"Sorry," she apologised. "I've never really looked at Rukongai. It's so different… So beautiful."

Hisagi smiled down at her. "Sometimes you should slow down, Alice. Relax. Give up on running and really get to know where you are."

Sometimes he did that – spout some random thought that should have been corny and ridiculous but was, coming from him, sincere and surprisingly just the kind of reminder she needed. Mostly he was cute in an awkward sort of way; he wasn't used to relationships and wasn't quite sure yet how to handle one when there were other people around.

She snuggled in to his side when a chilly breeze gusted past them. He let go of her hand in favour of wrapping his arm around her to shelter her a bit more, then turned them down another alley that would lead them eventually to another gate into Seireitei.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked suddenly.

She looked up at him, startled, and then away. "I think so. I don't know. It's hard to tell. Especially when I didn't notice in the first place."

He nodded and tightened his arm around her. She closed her eyes and for a while let him lead her blindly. It was nice, being able to rely on him like that. She wondered sometimes if she would ever be able to rely on Gin like that, or if there would always be that hint of doubt. Too, she wondered if she would someday be able to walk the streets hand-in-hand with him.

It didn't matter, not really, not when she knew she loved him anyway. But it was still a comforting sort of thing to do, taking a walk with the one you loved; it was intimate, and she wished she could be out there taking her leisurely stroll with Ichimaru Gin instead of Hisagi Shuuhei.

She instantly felt bad about it. Hisagi was intuitive, even if he couldn't read her thoughts. Besides that, it wasn't something she should have been thinking. Hisagi was perfectly wonderful company and an amazing man. She might not have felt bad about cheating on him, but she loved his company and wouldn't have traded it for anything less than Gin's.

Of course, that was just the problem.

Alice sighed and opened her eyes. If Hisagi noticed, he didn't say anything, didn't let on at all. She smiled gratefully and slid her arm around his waist. He rubbed her arm comfortingly and guided her through Seireitei to her division's barracks in companionable silence.

"Hisagi?" she asked after he'd kissed her goodbye and started to walk away.

He turned around, an expectant look on his face. "Hm?"

She hesitated. The whole situation was completely unfair to him. "Thanks. You know, for… being there."

He walked back over and cupped her face in his hands. A worried look skimmed over his face. "Alice," he breathed. He kissed her forehead gently. "I—" He cut off abruptly and shook his head; his lips brushed against her skin again and again with the motion. "I'll never leave you," he swore finally. "Never."

She smiled sadly and lifted her face to kiss him gently. "You're more than I deserve."

He gazed back at her solemnly. She didn't give him a chance to refute her claim as she skipped up the stairs two or three at a time.

It was times like those, watching Alice as she bounded away from him, knowing that she didn't need shunpo to outdistance most shinigami, watching her disappear, that Hisagi felt most alone.

Alice slid to a halt outside Rose's room and knocked. The tall blonde opened her door almost instantly, letting her oldest friend in.

"How was the mission?" Alice asked breathlessly.

"Great. Been running?"

Alice shook her head. "Out with Hisagi."

Rose adopted a knowing expression. "Ah." She turned back to her mirror and finished fixing her hair before she spoke next. "So…"

"So?" Alice ventured into the next expanding silence.

"So, you've been dating Hisagi a while."

"Yeah."

Rose turned to Alice and put her hands on her hips accusingly. "And you still don't call him by his first name."

Alice wrinkled her nose. "I like his last name better. Besides, it's more… familiar to me. More comfortable."

Rosalie shook her head and sighed. "You're ridiculous."

"Probably."

"Wanna go for a run?"

Alice laughed. "No thanks – it's kinda cold. I'd be glad to join you in the morning, though."

"I'll come get you after day break."

"Great."

Rose opened the door and Alice followed her out. "See you in the morning!" she called after her friend. Rose waved over her shoulder.

She waited a moment, staring blankly out the window after her friend. Captain Aizen of the Fifth Division walked by outside, in a rare moment without his Lieutenant. She followed him slowly with her eyes and wondered what he was doing outside her division, especially without his devoted Lieutenant Hinamori Momo, who might have wanted to visit her childhood friend Hitsugaya Toushiro.

The answer was obvious, of course. Gin had warned her about Aizen Sousuke, apparently under the man's orders, and left it to her to decide for herself. Aizen was looking for Gin.

And there he was, her silver haired lover, standing deep in the shadows. She didn't need to see him clearly to know it was him – half the time she couldn't see him clearly anyway, in the dark of night without her contacts in. The two exchanged a few quick words, to which it seemed to her that Gin nodded, agreeing, and then Gin flashed away without so much as a glance in her direction, though he surely knew she was there.

Alice felt a surge of disappointment. He was always careful to hide his reiatsu when he was near her, and suppressed it to almost nothing even when he wasn't, so she had no way of knowing where he went or whether or not she should head to his captain's suite yet. He could have at least stopped by; there was no one else in that particular hallway at that moment. It was a bad sign that she craved his presence so completely.

For whatever reason, Aizen remained standing there. Perhaps to make it look like he hadn't been doing anything suspicious. Perhaps to actually admire the huge morning glory flowers Rosalie had somehow gotten to grow along the side of the building. Alice watched him, fascinated by his behaviour and his mystery. She had heard from Isane, Captain Unohana's Lieutenant, about his Zanpakuto, but had never actually seen it in action. She and Rose had been in the real world when he'd shown the other Lieutenants. She was a little disappointed. It sounded amazing.

Aizen was well liked. He was nearly the opposite of Gin. Her captain came across as angry at the brunet often, though she knew it was only because Hinamori paid him more attention than she did Hitsugaya. She knew he had deep respect for Aizen; he conveyed that fact easily when he wasn't fuming over Hinamori – not that he'd admit to the latter. She hadn't had much interaction with him herself, but he had seemed like an all around nice guy. Until Gin told her what they were plotting.

They must have been working on it for ages. She probably wasn't being told the whole story, either. And they had probably waited until Gin was positive she wouldn't instantly turn them in to tell her. She wasn't sure what she was going to do with such heavy information weighing on her when she couldn't talk to Rose about it.

It was a devious and nefarious plan. It went against all her morals and ideals. And she was seriously considering it, all because of Ichimaru Gin. It was hard to believe a heinous plot such as this could be produced by such a kind, innocent looking man.

As though sensing her thoughts, Aizen, still standing at the wall, now running his fingers down the vines of the morning glories, which were almost in bloom, looked out of the corner of his eye at her over his shoulder.

Alice gasped and flattened herself beside the window, out of sight. She closed her eyes and willed the irrational panic away.

No, not irrational. The cold fury and malice in his gaze was terrifying. She couldn't understand what she'd done to deserve that kind of horrible passion. It frightened her, and she wasn't afraid to admit it to herself.

Slowly she eased back in front of the window. He was turned around then, gazing calmly up at her window. She caught full on the brunt of his hatred and found herself completely frozen in his consuming, angry stare. Her eyes were wide with terror and she tried unsuccessfully to pull herself away until she wished she would just collapse on the floor, simply to escape his eyes. He looked like he wanted to kill her on the spot; she had no doubt he could do it without batting an eyelash. Her blood raced in her veins, her eyes watered but wouldn't blink, her hands trembled, her knees shook, she felt like a rabbit backed into a corner, knowing it was about to die, looking for any escape but unable to find—

"Alice?"

She gasped again and spun, her heart pounding a furious rhythm as the adrenaline drained slowly. Hitsugaya stared back, surprised. "Captain!" she breathed. For a moment she'd thought it had been Aizen, somehow in two places at once.

"I didn't mean to startle you," he said. "You looked…" he trailed off, unsure.

Alice glanced back out the window hesitantly. Aizen was gone. "I guess I just got lost in thought."

He watched her suspiciously for a long moment before he nodded. "Don't come in too late tomorrow. I've got a mission for you and Rose before you disappear on me again."

"Yes, Sir."

He flashed away, a disconcerting habit of most captains. Alice herself hadn't perfected shunpo, though she and Rose hardly needed it anyway, as fast as they ran.

She shook her head and disappeared herself, into her own suite one floor up, just in case anyone was looking. Dusk had fallen, and no one would think it was strange if she went running this late, but she'd already told Rose she wasn't. Keeping several cover stories for hundreds of people was too time consuming – she would sneak out as soon as she could.

'As soon as she could' turned out to be longer than she wanted. Alice braved the not-so-completely-deserted streets to get to the Third Division barracks a little early. She slipped in Gin's window, through a kido he'd specifically designed to keep out everyone but her, and sat, waiting. She was much more patient in his room, on his bed, surrounded by his things and his smell, than in her own room.

Just as she was about to fall asleep, the door opened and Gin stepped in.

She smiled.


End file.
